Teacher Journals: Derek

11.8.02

Today, I was watching Mr. N. teach a segment of his precalculus class. He reviewed some application problems with which the kids were having considerable problems. The students have demonstrated that they can "do" the regular drills, but they are not demonstrating that they can "visualize" real world or higher-level problems application. They don't seem to understand that there are no universal procedures and no short cuts for solving these problems; some still seem to want recipes. This is such a crucial period in the development of students' math skills, when their literacy skills become very important - their ability to understand as well as to do!

After class, Mr. N. asked me if I wanted to teach part of his next period's class. I didn't expect his question and was nervous about the fact I had not taught since the Cambridge-Harvard Summer Academy. All told, my lesson went well, but it was not easy. I didn't really have time to prepare, and I felt like a juggler with one too many balls in the air. I was thinking about how to do the problem, while thinking about how to best explain it, while figuring out how to get the students involved, while ensuring that all the kids were following along, while passing out graphing calculators, while answering clarifying questions… It wasn't perfect, but I enjoyed my teaching, as usual. I always get a real energy kick from the students and being "on the edge." I see Mr. N. teaching effortlessly -- smoothly and naturally. I keep wondering how many years it takes to get as comfortable as he is.

Since we are supposed to observe classes in other departments than our own, I also observed Mr. P's 9th grade English class today. Mr. P. is engaging the kids in some extremely difficult work, and he seems to be getting good results from all of his students. Ninth-graders can be a tough crowd. But I can see the results of the ninth-grade teachers' work whenever I sit in on 11th or 12th grade classrooms. In the upper grades, the kids generally behave very well. They are mostly cordial, mature, focused, friendly, and quiet. Not in 9th grade! At the beginning of the year, freshman classes can be chaotic; the kids can be tough to control, and the teachers deserve about double the salary of a 12th grade teacher. Outside of class, Mr. P is a nice, easy-going, patient person. In class, though, he demonstrates that he can be a strict but consistent disciplinarian with the kids.

Teachers don't seem to receive respect simply from the authority of their position. It seems to me that students "behave" after the teacher has built some rapport with them. That rapport seems to be built on the students' knowing that the teacher cares and, respects them as learners. That kind of teacher seems to get respect back from the students.

I wonder how I will handle my classrooms when I officially "take over." I get energy from interacting with the students. I really like them. I enjoy being with them. That is the truth. I listen to them, and I trust them. Sometimes they take advantage of my trust, but I prefer to err on the side of responsibility and accountability than on treating them like immature kids. Could that be a mistake? I wonder if I will need to become much stricter to succeed in the classroom. Until now, it has not been my style.

12.17.02

The schedule has us ramping slowly into teaching our classes. I am ready and look forward to taking over my classes completely in late January.

This week, I was fortunate (in the long run!) to be able to take over two classes while the regular teacher (not my Mentor Teacher) had to proctor an MCAS exam. Both classes were pre-calculus. The first one comprised seniors who elected the extra math course; the second one had seniors, many of whom enrolled for the basic reason that the class fit their schedule. Generally (and not surprisingly), the first class was more motivated and interested.

Unfortunately, I didn't have any lead time to prepare detailed lesson plans, so I went into the classes pretty much like a substitute teacher would. It was clear to the students pretty quickly that I didn't have a handle on what I was supposed to do. And, in the end, although the classes were “teachable moments” for me, it was pretty humbling!

For the first pre-calculus class, the regular teacher had instructed me to distribute a worksheet for the students to complete in small groups. The exercise focused on switching between the standard form of quadratic equations and the vertex form. I knew the concept and roughly how to do it. Still, I had no book no review, no clarity, little lucidity. Let's face it: I had no confidence. I did not even know if the students had studied the material or if it was all totally new to them. It turned out to be the latter.

Since so many of the kids were having trouble with the concept, I decided to do the first few problems on the board. The plan was to accomplish this by questioning the kids and whenever they got stuck, to bluff my way through. Some of the kids caught on and learned. But, undeniably, some caught on to the fact that I was bluffing, and in the end, they were still confused near the end of class.

During the five-minute break between the two classes, I tried to catch up and learn as much as I could about these problems and the appropriate procedures. No time to even consider the conceptual issues! Bummer. It was clearly not my day because the second class had been unable to do the previous night's homework and asked me to review it. Real bummer. The homework was on using knowledge of quadratic equations to solve maximization problems. Again, I winged it like a migrating bird. I went to the board, and we did two of the problems together. At least these I could do fairly smoothly though not as articulately as I would have liked.

Feedback from an observer was that I did not define the variables, my handwriting was unintelligible, I should have used graphical representations of the situation, and that it seemed many of the students did not "get" the set up for the problem.

Obviously, the experience reinforced my desire to be always prepared. Can you say, “humility?”

Last month, I took the teacher test again. I had already passed the math test, but I also want to get certified in business, so I returned to take that test. During the exam, the necessary two pieces of identification sat on my desk, one of them my Harvard ID. When the proctor picked up my exam, he asked me if I was a Harvard student. I nodded, and he said, “So why on earth do you want to be a teacher?”

I could have kept him there for an hour.

5.30.03

When I decided to become a teacher, I wanted a job that I would look forward to going to every morning. The two classes I student taught this year convinced me that teaching was the right decision! Both classes were fun from the start. That is not to say that teaching them was easy. Far from it, but I enjoyed it tremendously. Saying “good bye” in May was difficult.

The ninth graders were the most challenging. At that age, students are going through a tough adolescence while trying to adjust to life in a high school setting. I appreciate what a difficult process it must be for them. For me, it meant I had to spend more time on classroom management issues than I would have liked. But that isn't the whole story. Together, we made great progress in math. I started the term with teaching linear functions and slope. By the end, we were making scatter graphs, plotting linear regressions, and making forecasts. Students also became adept at using graphing calculators. Some students, who were performing badly doing math on paper, really shined when using technology. I have to remember that some students show their strengths and learn in different ways.

The tenth graders were great fun all along. The difference in maturity during just that one year is stunning. They still have this crazy amount of energy, but they also are more focused on the job of learning math. They knew they have to take the high stakes State exams at the end of the year -- the one that they would have to pass in order to graduate. Most of them were also old enough to begin to realize the importance and role of math in their futures. I made myself available after school for extra math sessions. By the end of the term, I regularly had ten students who stayed for these sessions.

The tenth-grade class was focused on geometry. We used a new math curriculum that tried to connect classroom work to real world applications. Since I had not learned geometry in this format, I found it difficult to teach initially. Over time, I understood the rhythm and objectives of the curriculum, and the going got much easier.

Last Friday, our teacher education cohort had a party as its last get together. The program invited, amongst many others, all of our Mentor Teachers. I was pleased and honored that both of Mentors came. One of them said to me, “You must have done something right. The kids ask about you constantly. They really miss you.” It is nice to think that I reached them just as they reached me. I hope that I'll be able to continue making such connections as I move on in my teaching career.

Yup: teaching is now my profession!